Correct a weak response to this AQA English Language objective: Organise descriptive writing into a clear sequence of focus and detail.

Organise descriptive writing into a response: A weak response usually summarises, guesses, or names a method without effect. Improve it by choosing evidence, explaining the effect, and linking the point to audience, purpose or writer purpose method. For Descriptive writing, keep one clear focus, select brief evidence or a planned example, explain the method or writing choice, and link the point to effect, audience, purpose, form or tone where relevant.

This is effective because it makes the mistake correction, evidence, explanation and assessment objective visible. Replace summary with a precise point, brief evidence, method, effect and writer purpose so the correction is exam-ready. Descriptive writing should identify a structure method, such as opening, shift, focus, pace or ending, and explain its effect. Descriptive writing should plan audience, purpose, form, tone, viewpoint, content and structure before drafting.